The Ultimate Guide to Dating Flags
You may have heard of flags in reference to dating and relationships, but their meanings and how serious they are can get a bit confusing. Essentially, a dating flag is a quality or behaviour that someone shows, which can be positive, negative, or somewhere in between.
Here, we share our guide to dating flags where we highlight what red, green, beige, and pink flags are, with examples of each to help you to spot them.
Dating Red Flags
Perhaps the most well-known dating flag, red flags give cause for concern and their presence should deter you from seeing the date in question again.
Common dating red flags include:
It’s all about them – If your date makes you feel like you’re not being heard, your feelings aren’t being considered, and they’re not respecting your boundaries, you should seriously consider whether to see them again. You should feel confident that your date sees you as an equal, and any signs that they see themselves as being superior is a big dating red flag.
Lack of communication – It’s not a dating red flag if your date doesn’t respond to every call and message immediately, but it could be seen as concerning if days pass and you end up feeling ignored and rejected. Be honest about how much communication you need to feel secure, and if they’re not willing or able to respect this, it might be time to move on.
They get extremely jealous – Being extremely jealous can be a sign of controlling behaviour, a definite red flag in any relationship. If you feel like your date is trying to tell you who you can and can’t speak to, incorrectly accuses you of seeing other people once you’ve agreed to date exclusively, or makes comments that knock your confidence, they’re very unlikely to be relationship material.
Dating Green Flags
Green flags are what we all hope to see on dates, as these show that a person is compatible and doesn’t portray qualities that may cause hurt or disrespect in the future.
Common dating green flags include:
They share your values – Understanding each other’s values is important, as shared values create a great foundation for a strong relationship. Values cover a whole range of things, some of which you might not discuss until you’ve had a few dates, but they’re definitely worth keeping in mind as you get to know each other.
You feel confident – Being able to relax and be yourself around a date is really important, as it’s vital that you feel comfortable when you’re with them. If your date makes you feel like you can’t be your authentic self, it’s unlikely that they’re right for you.
Kindness – It may seem like a simple thing, but when your date is kind to you and other people, it’s a huge green flag. Kindness can include everything from paying you a compliment and being considerate of your feelings to thoughtful gestures, such as paying for drinks or buying you a gift.
Dating Beige Flags
A beige flag is essentially a quirky behaviour or habit, so nothing to worry about, but spotting one could help you to determine whether you’d like to see your date again. As beige flags are very specific to individuals, it’s hard to pinpoint common examples, however, these could include:
- Something they say often – A dating beige flag could be that your date has a phrase that they use a lot which they might say out of context, or just too often. Although it might make you cringe at times, it doesn’t have the potential to have a negative impact on a future relationship.
- Eating habits – Many people have eating quirks that could be seen as beige flags, such as eating food in a certain order, putting weird food combinations together, or being picky about unusual foods. It might be something you notice every time you eat together, but not something that should cause concern.
Dating Pink Flags
Not as worrying as red flags, but concerning enough to require a bit of consideration, spotting pink flags can help you to decide whether future dates are on the cards.
Common dating pink flags include:
- Thoughtless behaviour – This could include turning up to a date late with no good reason, expecting you to organise dates without input from them, or being unwilling to go on dates that aren’t centred solely around their interests. These acts don’t necessarily mean that they’re a thoughtless person, but be wary if it becomes a frequent occurrence and you begin to feel undervalued.
- Talking about their ex – If the person you’re dating was with their ex for a long time, it may simply be that many of their stories and anecdotes involve them. However, be cautious if you get the impression that they’re speaking about their ex a lot because they still have feelings for them, as this could have a negative impact down the line.
- They have a history of cheating – Everyone has a dating history, but if it starts to become apparent that your date has been unfaithful in the past, this could be a pink flag – especially if you’ve been cheated on in previous relationships. People do change, and just because someone has cheated before, it doesn’t mean they’ll do it again. However, it’s certainly worth putting some thought into whether you feel secure and confident that you can trust them before moving forward.
Now that you understand the difference between dating red, green, beige, and pink flags, we hope that you will feel confident in identifying them on your upcoming dates.
If you’d like help finding someone with plenty of those all-important green flags, we’d love to set you up with some compatible matches. Apply for one of our tailored memberships today, and look forward to some great dates.